Submitted by: Tim Dunn
Today we do things at breakneck speed and don’t really have the luxury of slowing down to see things through.
I have aspirations of seeing two things through before the good Lord takes me home: to be a husband to my bride and to be a Daddy to my little girl Elizabeth.
Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. As an analytical person, I want to dive deeper into that statistic and get to the why. I think part of it has to do with compromise. What are you willing to compromise your marriage for? Most people would look at the term compromise, and see it as a good thing; usually they would be right. But I am talking about compromising from a different angle. Well, from a different definition actually. I am looking specifically at the verb form of the word. Compromise means “to weaken (a reputation or principle) by accepting standards that are lower than is desirable.” Now, how does that translate into a marriage?
Well, think of all the marriages that you have seen end in divorce. Why was that? Many times it’s because folks will accept standards that just won’t add up in the end. Choosing a desired lifestyle over another, partying with the boys too much, shopping with the girls all the time, or not being present in the marriage when you should be, will weaken the standards of your marriage. Want to divorce-proof your marriage? Don’t want to be in the bad side of the fifty percent statistic? DON’T COMPROMISE! Be present in the moment for your spouse. Despite the statistics, you can last the test of time.
My other big desire is to be my daughter’s Daddy forever. Sure, I will be a father forever, but not everyone is a dad forever. Recently, my 5-year-old taught me a lesson. After coming home from a long day at the office, she asked me to take her out to the park for the evening. Very quickly, I made an excuse not to go and went on preparing dinner. She shrugged her shoulders and walked away. Instantly, I felt terrible. Sixty minutes at the park weren’t going to kill me, but it was going to brighten her day. So . . . we went.
While we were there, my daughter met a little girl who literally gave her a free kite to fly. When we were flying it, another little girl came up to Elizabeth, mesmerized by the kite, and as we were bringing it in, we noticed the little girl getting more and more excited. I asked Elizabeth if she wanted to pass the kite along to that little girl, and she instantly said, “Yes. She needs it Daddy.” My heart just melted. What a great moment. It was a moment that would have been missed had we not gone. I want to be her Daddy forever!
My goal in both of these areas of my life is simple: I will not compromise or give up something that someone else can do, for something that only I can do. I can be the only first husband for my wife. I can be my daughter’s only Daddy.
Never pick something that someone else can ultimately do, for something that only YOU can do!
Read about pursuing a happy marriage at WebMD, find out the secrets to a happy marriage at Real Simple, read more about being a great parent in these articles, or learn ten scientific facts about parenting happy children.